My Tribute* - Rev Phyllis Marsh-Jarvis
Alt Title: Flowers for my friend, confidante, other mother (maybe fairy godmother) and fierce cheerleader
When I got the news of her passing my first thought was sorrow with an underlay of gratitude. I am thankful for the many opportunities I had to connect with Phyllis (as she let me refer to her) over the many years that I have known her. I continuously tried my best and made every effort to “giver her flowers” for the impact she had in my life throughout its twists and turns. Her specific fingerprints on the arc of my path to feeling a sense of place and belonging in Nova Scotia are perhaps best exemplified in what I had chosen as my images (but never posted) for the ‘how it started; how it’s going’ meme.
I first met Phyllis as a fellow member of the board for the Health Association of African Canadians where we became fast friends. We worked on several issues of the newsletter. She encouraged me to speak up at meetings, she supported my perspective when she felt I needed it and most of all she saw in me the possibilities and potential for greater leadership and contribution than I had seen in myself.
Through the years she gave great advice, let me cry on her shoulders and laughed along with my foolishness all while keeping me socially connected and supported under her nurturing wings.
When she moved to Cape Breton we stayed connected through her emails to her Prayer Warriors. I read them faithfully and would write her a short note when an entry she shared was particularly poignant (see examples below).
Jan 2020
From Phyllis: “Through the years,...Happy birthday to me! Psalm 139:16 […]
From me: “I saw your email and the sun shone on me. I am so blessed to have you on the earth. Thank you for all the years of encouragement and support.”
From Phyllis: “It is so good to hear from you. I miss you dearly. I do hope all is well with you. When you get a chance let's stay in touch. God bless.”
April 2018
From Phyllis: A reflection on love and the value of time
From me: “thank you so much Rev, this is so beautiful. I will print it for Mother's Day. I am sure my mom will love it!
From Phyllis: You are most welcome. How are you?
From me: I am well, life is changing faster as I get older, but the wisdom of the elders and the lesson of early experiences (including my many conversations with you) only seem to be more and more relevant.
Feb 2016
From Phyllis: A reflection on the importance of encouraging and being compassionate to those seeking us out for support or facing risk or danger
From me: “Thanks Phyllis. This was a wonderful read, though emotional it was a great reminder of what is important in life. And Happy Valentine's Day.
Rest in peace Rev. Condolences to your nearest and dearest.
Thank you for your advice in all areas of my life, thank you for modelling the best of what I appreciate in humanity – the willingness to grow and learn and evolve. Thank you for your generosity an how you embraced me (and as I am reading from online tributes, so many others from all walks of life).
I am grateful for the moments and the memories and remain inspired by your role in my life and hope to continue the work you invited me into as one of the many people whose lives you touched; bearers of your legacy.
* "My Tribute" is also a famous Andrea Crouch song